aka Yes, But We Already Knew All of That: The Movie
Rich in atmosphere and tension, with some marvelous terrifying scenes accompanied by an excellent score and haunting imagery. But it came out of the oven a bit too early with that patently insane third act. Still though, worth a re-watch.
Satantango (Bela Tarr, 1994): 2/5
Satantango so resolutely refuses to occupy the realm of cinema, it seems to stare you in the eye and dare you to call it a ‘movie.’ Bela Tarr’s seven-hour-long Everest on celluloid is out to torment its audience into nihilism. Most often, this abuse comes in the form of momentously long takes that challenge you to care, to emote - at all - after spending eight minutes looking at cows, or a forest, or a drunk man.... Occasionally, though, Tarr employs cruelty so abject that it feels sadistic. (This is most notable in a prolonged sequence of a child torturing a cat.)
I like the part where they went for a walk :)
Hard to Be a God (Aleksey German, 2013): 1.5/5
I suppose I admire the technical prowess, vision, and dedication it must have taken to make this opus. But it's impossible to follow narratively (I'm sure intentional), has disgusting soundscapes and visuals, and a bloated indulgent run-time. Ultimately though, the issue for me isn't so much that nothing "happens" as that nothing progresses; for 3 hours, German just keeps constructing formally complex Steadicam shots that navigate impressively cluttered and decrepit sets populated by grotesques, and while any given few minutes is visually striking, every few minutes is the same few minutes. The entire point of the source material appears to have been discarded in favor of an epic exercise in production design.
rewatched A.I. Artificial Intelligence (Steven Spielber, 2001) 4/5
Satantango (Bela Tarr, 1994): 2/5
Satantango so resolutely refuses to occupy the realm of cinema, it seems to stare you in the eye and dare you to call it a ‘movie.’ Bela Tarr’s seven-hour-long Everest on celluloid is out to torment its audience into nihilism. Most often, this abuse comes in the form of momentously long takes that challenge you to care, to emote - at all - after spending eight minutes looking at cows, or a forest, or a drunk man.... Occasionally, though, Tarr employs cruelty so abject that it feels sadistic. (This is most notable in a prolonged sequence of a child torturing a cat.)
I like the part where they went for a walk :)
Hard to Be a God (Aleksey German, 2013): 1.5/5
I suppose I admire the technical prowess, vision, and dedication it must have taken to make this opus. But it's impossible to follow narratively (I'm sure intentional), has disgusting soundscapes and visuals, and a bloated indulgent run-time. Ultimately though, the issue for me isn't so much that nothing "happens" as that nothing progresses; for 3 hours, German just keeps constructing formally complex Steadicam shots that navigate impressively cluttered and decrepit sets populated by grotesques, and while any given few minutes is visually striking, every few minutes is the same few minutes. The entire point of the source material appears to have been discarded in favor of an epic exercise in production design.
rewatched A.I. Artificial Intelligence (Steven Spielber, 2001) 4/5
Top 3 favorite Spielberg. Kubrick and Spielberg, working together on different time planes, creating a total philosophical and intellectual heartbreaker.
rewatched District 9 (Neill Blomkamp, 2009): 3.5/5
Neill Blomkamp has never been able to properly follow this up, but DISTRICT 9 remains a hell of a feature film debut. A real sci-fi banger, satisfying both for its allegory and action beats.
Redoubt (Matthew Barney, 2019): 1/5
Deranged. Only Yale freshmen philosophy majors would dig this. Cremaster Cycle this is not!
The Human Voice, 30 mins. (Almodovar, 2020): 3.5/5
Beautifully shot, exquisite production design, flawless costumes, and Tilda with her airpods and DVD collection. <3
The Forgiveness of Blood (Joshua Marston, 2011): 2/5
Maria Full of Grace managed to be consistently tense as well as earnest; here, the blood feud essentially amounts to a lethal variation on house arrest, which means boredom for long stretches. Marston clearly did his homework, and by god, homework is what you'll get.
Valley of the Dolls (Mark Robson, 1967): 2.5/5
First hour: "Not as campy as I'd always heard. Almost elegant, even."
rewatched District 9 (Neill Blomkamp, 2009): 3.5/5
Neill Blomkamp has never been able to properly follow this up, but DISTRICT 9 remains a hell of a feature film debut. A real sci-fi banger, satisfying both for its allegory and action beats.
Redoubt (Matthew Barney, 2019): 1/5
Deranged. Only Yale freshmen philosophy majors would dig this. Cremaster Cycle this is not!
The Human Voice, 30 mins. (Almodovar, 2020): 3.5/5
Beautifully shot, exquisite production design, flawless costumes, and Tilda with her airpods and DVD collection. <3
The Forgiveness of Blood (Joshua Marston, 2011): 2/5
Maria Full of Grace managed to be consistently tense as well as earnest; here, the blood feud essentially amounts to a lethal variation on house arrest, which means boredom for long stretches. Marston clearly did his homework, and by god, homework is what you'll get.
Valley of the Dolls (Mark Robson, 1967): 2.5/5
First hour: "Not as campy as I'd always heard. Almost elegant, even."
Second hour: "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh."
That Hamilton Woman (Alexander Korda, 1941): 3/5
"Now I’ve kissed you through two centuries.”
That Hamilton Woman (Alexander Korda, 1941): 3/5
"Now I’ve kissed you through two centuries.”
Vivian Leigh is the G.O.A.T. of complex triangular relationships: GWTW, Anna Karenina, Streetcar Named Desire, That Lady Hamilton. Olivier’s Nelson is a nest of contradictions, crippled by war and selfishness. Filmed in 1941 with Napoleon as the stand-in for Nazis.
Society (Brian Yuzna, 1989): 1.5/5
An entirely tepid and forgettable hour of occult-thriller "suspense", followed by a must be seen to be believed half hour of the most demented, psychotic body-horror practical effects. This is not what George Constanza wanted!
Ichi the Killer (Takashi Mike, 2001): 1/5
Movie should have been called Kakihara the Fashion Icon.
Happy as Lazzaro (Alice Rorhwacher, 2018): 2/5
Really not into that whole aggressively rough, deep-rural cinematographic approach, which saturates everything with a "timeless" atmosphere. Another intellectual experiment in the same vein as Christian Petzold's Transit - which I also didn't care for.
Klute (Alan J. Pakula, 1971): 3.5/5
"I'm the best actress in the world."
"I'm the best actress in the world."
I like how Bree continues to go to therapy during all this. Essentially structured around a series of various types of interviews, which is great for giving Fonda one complicated monologue after another (all of which she nails) but does have the side effect of the movie doing all your homework for you.
Life (Anton Corbijn, 2015): 1/5
Hey has anyone ever made a movie about like a journalist or writer hanging out with a historical famous person? It could center around a particularly iconic moment in the celebrity's career, and maybe they learn a little something about each other along the way.
Hey has anyone ever made a movie about like a journalist or writer hanging out with a historical famous person? It could center around a particularly iconic moment in the celebrity's career, and maybe they learn a little something about each other along the way.
An Officer and a Spy (Roman Polanski, 2019): 1/5
Who gives a shit? Demerits for stealing Celine Sciamma's thunder at the Cesar Awards for Best Director.
Who gives a shit? Demerits for stealing Celine Sciamma's thunder at the Cesar Awards for Best Director.
Happy End (Michael Haneke, 2017): 2/5
Tedious study in upper-class malaise, in which Haneke recycles elements from virtually all of his previous films.
Tedious study in upper-class malaise, in which Haneke recycles elements from virtually all of his previous films.
Satantango and How to be a God party game: drink when you see mud.
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